I stuck my hand in my pocket after I got dressed for work.
Self reassured of exactly what I did not wanna remind myself of;
Being flat broke.
Too many times has the Lord stepped through with fleshy lifelines,
My mother-in-law, my closest cousin, my own mother sometimes,
But this time, it seems we’ve past the borrowing point.
It hurts to be a man that cannot provide the lifestyles imagined by my woman and child.
In actuality a comforting, confident smile… is all I would love to give them.
I just wanna give them hope.
Hey yo, how you do that when you flat out broke!?
When the last measure of cash is only a reminder of the unpaid utilities, car notes and insurances…
I sure fucking hope that Hope knows my address,
Because dear Lord, I’ve been begging you for a promotion, praying for a job lead, pleading for a wining lotto ticket or atleast a fresh…
Its pointless requesting receipts from the atm,
All they say is what my account looked like on pay day,
Ejecting out after the insufficient request, and the thought of experiencing it again burns my chest in a painful, disrespectful, shameful and embarrassing type of way.
Worst thing is; it always seems to be my luck to use the machine after some rich person because the left over transaction stub is always upwards of 5k.
So much for being a military veteran and serving a patriotic purpose.
I don’t want any handouts unless its a handshake with a promising salary that provides the means for me to take my expecting wife for a deserved milkshake.
I’ll work, its the only way I intend to earn,
I even took the time to go back to school and learn.
Dad, Full-time student, part-time job, internship and prior service.
Why can’t I just get my own kernel off the American cobb without feeling burned?
Yo’ I am flat dead broke,
Dusty cobwebs pockets, no wallet having, maxed out credit card holding, negative credit score asssss… Damn!
A Bentley gently drove by me the other day,
I just begged for a reason for the driver to look my way,
So I can ask for a day…
A moment, a chance to display,
My skills and talents in a professional play, power move and hopefully land a better occupation to help improve upon my situation.
But she didn’t, and I didn’t have the gas to follow her ass, much less the class, like even my car got pride.
Nah, I saw where the fuel gauge was at…
I’m just Flat Broke.
***photo credits due to: http://voicesofglass.files.wordpress.com/2012/01/atminsuff.png ***
Image was edited to give my blog post a sense of individuality. Original photo content used from previously mentioned blog.